Dreaming

Tom has told me that he has cheated on me by having a one-night stand. I don’t react and just accept it. He also tells me that he’s going to London for the weekend as he’s seeing someone else but will be back after the weekend. I accept that too.

I am sitting on a sofa in a house similar to Park Road. I am annoyed with myself for just accepting. I should have said something. I begin to text Tom a message to say I am really upset that he’s cheating and leaving his family for the weekend while he sees someone else. I don’t finish the text as there is a knock at the door. I open it to find a man standing there. I’m hoping he doesn’t want money as I don’t have any. He has come to clean Tom’s car; he opens the doors to the car and throws out Tom’s records. I hope they haven’t smashed. He starts asking about the house next door and when the people moved out. I look and see the front door is now boarded up with brown painted wood. I say to him that no one has lived there since I moved in, but I didn’t realise the owner had boarded it up like this. He tells me he took over the house and did something to it, but I don’t recall what now. The man is kind, a bit fat with grey hair. When he has finished, he starts to put the records back in the car, but they won’t go in properly. The car is small; I try. I can get them all in, but they aren’t in how Tom would have liked them and risk being damaged. I ask the man how much money Tom owes him; he says he’ll sort it with Tom when he sees him next but that it will be £10. I look in my pocket and find more money than I realised I had. Not enough to pay him but more than I thought.

I have to go somewhere. I walk to my destination with Josh. When I need to return, I climb onto a bicycle and even though the seat is too low, I start to cycle home. I pass lots of women on bikes coming towards me, some in Jellicombe uniforms; the gaps I go through are narrow at times, and I have to manoeuvre carefully.

Back home, the girls are in the shower, and I have to keep running backwards and forwards to make sure they are ok. I can’t tell whether it is Amelia, Rosie or Annie in the shower. There are two showers; they are large with steps leading up and all open.

Tom somehow knows that I am annoyed and is back home. I tell him how I feel, and he feels bad for not being with the family over the weekend, but no mention of the cheating or the other woman.