I miss Phil.

I never thought this would happen, but the last couple of days I’ve really missed him. I’ve told myself it’s the elements of the relationship I miss, but I don’t know if that’s true – the relationship was what it was because of him, because of his kindness, and his patience.

I miss his cuddles. I miss having someone to share things with who won’t judge or laugh. I miss the fun we have and the ease I feel around him. I miss his friendship.

There are things I don’t miss too, but they don’t seem quite so overwhelming now. I need to just sit with this – to just miss him – because I know that I could change my mind again. I wish I weren’t so fickle.