Tag: Joke

Sorry

This morning, while drying myself after my shower, I managed to pull a muscle in my back. It was painful and limiting my movements, so after dropping Annie to school, I nipped into Tom’s to ask him to knead it out a bit. It worked, and my back felt much better afterwards. Really what I…

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Relief

Annie came home last night. I can’t begin to describe the relief I felt when she walked through the door. It’s been a stressful week where I’ve had to face a lot of fears and really learn to put my trust in Tom, despite his previous threats. Now, the fact that he didn’t carry out…

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Joke

Tomorrow, Annie goes away for a week with Tom. It will be the first time she’s been away from me for more than a night at a time. I really didn’t want to agree, but I didn’t think it fair to deprive Tom and Annie of time together, and his family time with their grandchild….

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Liar

At my counselling session, Jane gave me a set of Russian Dolls, asked me to take them home and work with them. She wanted me to look at each layer and really feel what each layer represents in Tom. I did this exercise tonight. It was very painful, and I really didn’t want to do…

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Slipping

Tom and I have been trying to make another go of it, but I don’t think it will work. I can’t help noticing that the more time we spend together, the more comfortable he becomes and the more it feels as though he’s slipping back to his old ways. I know I could be wrong;…

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Undercurrent

Dreaming I am walking through the local shopping centre; there are men dancing towards me swathed in fabric that is glittery and pink. There is a lot of fun going on but I feel an undercurrent of slight fear as they come towards me.

Lesson

I joined a dating site last week.  I know it’s been less than three months since Tom and I split up, and if I’m honest with myself, I don’t actually want a relationship, but I will not let what happened between us define my future. I will not allow Tom’s actions to shape my thoughts…

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List

I decided to make a list tonight of all the reasons I will never get back together with Tom. I went through my diaries, listing everything out, and as I read through everything, more and more memories came back to the surface – things I had never written about but were obviously hurtful enough for…

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Game

Although Tom and I have decided to give this one last try, he has now started making what he calls jokes about me and the older children all moving out. It’s relentless. Every few days, there’s another ‘joke’ about us going back to our old house, or about my other children going to live with…

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Inevitable

I had a counselling session today and have come to realise that the way I am with Tom is becoming more and more like the way my parents were with each other, and I don’t like it one bit. I definitely need to recognise it when it happens and change it. I was wondering if…

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Rollercoaster

Just as I was starting to really believe things were changing, I’m now worrying that things with Tom are slipping again. Tonight, I popped out for an hour to take Josh to his judo class. When I got back, I wanted to have a little bit of time to unwind, but then Annie woke up….

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Names

As Annie had a feed and fell asleep in my arms, I was looking at her and thinking about how one day she could be looking down at her children, and it made me quite melancholy. I told Tom what I’d been thinking, and he said that we won’t be around to see grandchildren. I…

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Saturday

It’s Saturday night, which, for Tom and I, has always meant having a curry and a drink together, except I stopped drinking almost nine months ago when I fell pregnant. He didn’t stop. Tonight, when our curry arrived, he opened his beers and brought out a bottle of vodka that he’d bought earlier. He poured…

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