It suddenly struck me today why Phil is back in my life; why Tom is still in my life; why I’m having issues with friends; and why I was with Greg and Danny. I unravelled my past into a heap of jumble to be sifted through and put into some order, if possible.

Danny, Greg, Tom and Phil were/are all in my life because in one way or another I wanted them to rescue me. Friends, I rescue and then feel resentment when they do nothing for me in return.

I feel as though I need to unpick my life until I work my way back to the root cause of all of this. I have a need to be looked after, which breeds a lack of responsibility for myself. Ultimately, it’s because I don’t trust myself to make the right choices.