My feelings for Phil have changed, yet again.

How many times does this have to happen before I act on them? How many times am I going to have loving feelings towards him, and the next thing he’s the last man I want?

It started on Saturday. He was due to come over, but I didn’t really want to spend the night with him. However, as it was planned, I did it anyway. I didn’t feel close to him at all and resented that him being here was preventing me from doing what I wanted to do. I ended up going to bed before him, while he sat up talking to Josh, which has never happened before.